21 Weeks

21 weeks...the baby is kicking like mad. The past few days especially sometimes it'll kick so hard that I kinda jump up myself. I went to the doctor the other week (which was a different dr than I usually see) and they were moving the doppler all over my belly trying to find the heartbeat. The Dr was like "Whoa! Do you feel all that movement? My gosh, that's an active baby!" It seems to really like music too as it is more active when louder music is playing.
J set up the crib and the dresser the other weekend and it looks so good! I have already started organizing the room and putting clothes away in the drawers by size. We got the crib skirt, mattress pad, mattress and a crib sheet as well so it is coming along nicely. Don't really have a "theme". We just have certain colors we are using (sage green, light blue, cream, tan & brown) and are using stripes and polka dots. Also found a glider we liked that is a chocolate corduroy.
Also finished registering at Babies R Us and Target over the weekend. We pretty much changed all of our baby gear (stroller, pack n play, high chair) after we read Consumer Reports ratings and reviews. I usually let J decide on the color of things and I think he's done a great job!
Trying to get everything done now while I feel pretty good. Oh yeah, and J says I look huge! Little does he know I'll only get bigger :)

Eyy!

We had our ultrasound yesterday and that is so cool! We made sure to tell the tech that we didn't want to know the sex so she didn't even look for it. The baby kept flipping around and changing positions. I was not surprised cause it's daddy can't sit still either! It just made is so much more real, at least to me.







I normally do not like it when people post ultrasound photos, but I thought this one was funny. It's like the baby has heard me asking if it's in there, so it's going "Hey Mom, I'm here!" Or it's going "Eyy!" like Fonzie or Rocky.

Hellooo Are you in There?

So I have officially moved from the Sick Stage to the Weird Stage. I still have some pregnancy symptoms (heartburn! fatigue!) but for the most part feel pretty good. I haven't felt the baby kick yet...well last night I felt a little flutter and I think that might have been it...but I am not entirely sure. And I don't really look pregnant, just fat. So what I am getting at is that I don't really feel pregnant anymore, but I know that something is growing inside me, which makes it just....weird. Oftentimes I'll put my hand on my stomach and say, "Baby are you in there?"






Here's my 18 week bump pic. Enjoy!
(don't worry I will never wear my glasses in a pic again, and I will comb my hair!)

Lifesavers

This week I have been going to the bathroom even more than my pregnancy usual. At work I'll get up from my desk, go to the bathroom, then get back to my desk and have to go again. At least I'm getting some exercise! One night I woke up 7 times to go to the bathroom. Strangely enough, I still slept pretty good, but I think that is because my mother-in-law bought me THE BEST THING EVER! It is a pregnancy body pillow without the top part so you can still use your own pillow. So pretty much I cuddle with it and then put the biggest part in between my knees. The first couple of nights I positioned it according to the directions and it kid of hurt my back. But the past few nights I have just been using it however it fits and man is it awesome. I have slept so well this week.
My mom also bought me a fan and that has been a lifesaver as well. I have been so hot, and I'll just whip that thing out whenever the mood strikes. I don't care if I look dumb or if people stare, I am HOT! I also got some really cute dresses from my step-mom which are so much more comfortable than any pant could ever be. I'll dress them down for the weekend and dress them up for work.
I have the best Moms ever!! And I am so blessed to have three!!

The Grizz

J and I went to a Grizzlies game last night. The Boyz II Men concert last week was also an Ovarian Cancer Foundation benefit and they had a silent auction. So we ended up with really good seats (4th row) for a fraction of the cost. Apparently, the dad from "The Blind Side" was sitting in front of us. Never seen the movie so it didn't mean to me, but people around us were excited.
Since we were sitting so close to the action and I of course had to go to the bathroom, I had to climb up what seemed like a million stairs. I had to pause at every landing and when I finally got to the top I exhaled and took a big break. The usher at the top of the stairs starting laughing at me! After going to the bathroom and walking around the whole place trying to find something appetizing, I started the trek back down the stairs. The usher saw me and said, "No need to show your ticket, I remember your panting." Well, I knew she didn't really mean anything by it, but I told her I was pregnant and that I'd see her on the way back up. When you're pregnant, you really don't care anymore what people think. Not that I cared much before either.
J FINALLY did his job and snagged a t-shirt for me that the cheerleaders were handing out. It's about time he used his height for his advantage. I only married him cause he's tall anyways.

16 weeks

16 weeks...starting to feel better the past week or so. Or am I just used to the morning sickness/better at managing it? Either way, I'll take what I can get. Right now the heartburn is the worst. I've never had it before in my life and hope I never get it again. Now am I not only limited to what I eat because of the nausea and gas, but now the heartburn. My go-to foods are filet mignon, baked potatoes and green beans. If I could have that every night, I'd be so happy. I think I've had pretty much every symptom a pregnant lady can get. If I can get away without getting hemorrhoids, I'll consider myself lucky.
This morning I was running late for work when the dog decided it would be a good time to start throwing up. The sight of him throwing up made me start dry heaving...and then while cleaning up I had to stop every now and then to run to the bathroom. All the while the dog is sulking/trying to eat his throw up. The hilarity of the situation hit me on the drive to work and I just started cracking up in my car. Wonder if the dog is having sympathy pains?

Beef 'n Cheddar

I decided to introduce the kid to Beef 'n Cheddars today. I thought it was appropriate because Arbys was a large part of my childhood. Then I had a nervous breakdown because I realized I just ate "deli meat." Or whatever it is, I think it is close to deli meat. Pregnant women are now not allowed to eat deli meat, or it has to be heated until steaming.
The restrictions put on pregnant women today are crazy: my mother is appalled. When I told her that my prenatal vitamins were making me sick, she asked "What are these prenatal vitamins?" I was appalled that she didn't know what they were, and didn't she take them? Apparently, back in the 70s and 80s women didn't have to take vitamins, as their diet should suffice. Nowadays prenatals are practically shoved down our throat. Heck, I was even taking them for 6 mos before even getting pregnant. And we can't eat soft cheese and hot dogs, and what else? Not to mention all the things we can't do. It's like we are expected to live like bubble boy for 9 (10) months. I have no problem with not drinking alcohol or smoking as those aren't even good for you when you're not pregnant. But you're telling me that if I eat a ham sandwich or have some bleu cheese on my salad that I could harm the baby?
If you read the fine print on most of these things, it really is OK to eat them, you just might get a little sick. Actually, the same effect as if you're not pregnant. Anyone can get sick from deli meat that has been sitting out for awhile...Remember J in college when we had subs and I was violently ill in your dorm bathroom the whole night? As I was puking, he was cheering me on...that's when I knew he was a keeper. Anyone can get sick from unpasteurized cheese or juice.
BUT we are so barraged with "Don't eat this" and "Don't do that" that it scares us. Of course we want the best for our babies, so we stay as far away from ANYTHING that could harm our baby in ANY way whatsoever, even if the risk is 1 in a million. Then have panic attacks when we realized we ate a morsel of bleu cheese on a salad last night. I mean, aren't we supposed to enjoy being pregnant?
I admit, I have been one of those ladies who has not eaten anything suspicious, won't lift up anything heavier than a pound, and has choked down the prenatal vitamins even when I knew they would make me sick. Like any other parent, I just want the best for my child and want them to have every advantage in the world from the first time they cry. I have also not enjoyed this pregnancy much so far either. I would think a happy mommy would make a happy baby more than staying away from a hot dog. So yes, I will do my best, and of course will continue to stay away from the really bad things (which thankfully I don't like anyways). But I am a realistic person, and more than anything I want to enjoy being pregnant.
So bring on the Beef 'n Cheddars baby!!

The Heart Brings You Back

Driving home from work today I heard a certain Blues Traveler song "Hook" and I got a little choked up and teary eyed...and here is why.
I was in Houston relaxing after work one day in December when my phone rang, and it was my mother. All she said was my name, and I instantly started crying because I could tell something was really really wrong. She explained to me that my grandma and grandpa had been on their way to Virginia for Christmas when they had stopped at a rest area in Ohio. My grandpa passed out and lost consciousness and was rushed to the local hospital. My mom and stepdad were on their way to Ohio to see him and could I come? There was never a question for me; my grandpa "Papa" was my partner in crime, my other pea in the pod. We had been close since I was a very young girl. My grandma always said that it was because we were both Capricorns, but I know that he was my soulmate. At Thanksgiving, when the ladies would go shopping, Papa and I would go to the bookstore. Then we'd spend all the rest of the weekend reading. He was so even tempered, caring, and funny and miraculously always understood me and accepted me for who I was.
I was already planning on going to Virginia for Christmas so I called the airline to get my flight changed. They politely informed me that it was going to cost $1000 for me to change my flight on such short notice. I cried, I screamed at them. Didn't they realize what was going on? This was Papa, my friend, my confidante. I wasn't just changing my flight because I felt like it. I HAD to go there; he needed me. Of course, the money didn't really matter. I was just mad at the world at that moment.
In the hospital, my grandpa was in a coma and the prognosis wasn't good. One nurse told me that she had seen people come back from being in a coma and that a variety of things could aid in bringing the person back. I searched through my iPod and decided that I was going to play some music for grandpa. Maybe he'd like that. So I chose "Hook" because it is commonly mistaken for the title "The Heart Brings You Back", and the fact that he loved harmonica music. I took one end of my earbud and put it into my ear, and the other into his. Nothing magical happened, except that I felt close to him as we were listening to the music. It was my way of telling him goodbye and that I loved him. Memories of my childhood with him flashed before me...reading together, helping me with my Henry Ford project in school, running out of gas in the country, watching Shirley Temple movies, taking trips in the RV...
I had picked up "Memoirs of a Geisha" in the airport before I'd left Houston and was furiously reading it while waiting in the hospital for days. It helped take my mind off of things, and the story was just so touching to me. On the return trip, I was nearing the end of it. I sat next to a teenager who asked how it was and that she really wanted to read it. I told her that when I finished it that I would give it to her. But as I was finishing the book, the story had given me so much comfort over the past horrific few days that I just couldn't part with it. I turned to the girl and told her, with tears in my eyes, "I'm sorry, this book means too much to me. I can't give it to you." Somehow, even though I felt terrible for going back on my word, she seemed to understand. Maybe she had lost someone important in her life too.
For about two years after that time, whenever I heard that song, I would cry. J might hear it first and change the channel or warn me that it was on. Now I can listen to it, and smile as I think of the memories I have of Papa. Today for some reason, it just made me cry again. I don't know if it's the pregnancy hormones (probably) or knowing that my child won't get a chance to know such an amazing man. J never knew Papa either, and that has been hard for me to accept. I just have to know that he is looking down on us from somewhere, and my mom swears that he says "Hi" every time we find a penny.
When I was 7 weeks along, J and I went in for my first appointment and they gave me an ultrasound. When I reached for my clothes to get dressed, a penny fell out of the pocket of my jeans. I didn't notice it at the time, but as we left J handed me the penny and said "Well, your grandpa is the first to know we're pregnant." I just smiled and said "Hi Papa, I miss you."

We decided on a daycare. We are going with the more laid back, convenient and less expensive daycare. J suggested pretending that we are paying for the more expensive daycare and then putting the difference towards a college account. He has the best ideas; he really amazes me. So tomorrow I am going to drop off the paperwork and pay the deposit. Cross that off my list!
Speaking of lists, I did find a pregnancy checklist on thebump.com. Of course I amended it, but I am so relieved to know what and when we need to do everything. We are going to register in a couple of weeks when the new Babies R Us opens. I am expecting not to have a shower because it is the same thing as when we got married, our family and friends live across the country and it is just too hard to get everyone together. And honestly I am uncomfortable with all the attention and oohhing and ahhing. I am so Miranda...So I figured we'd still register and then people can use that for Christmas gifts. Plus, they give a discount to any items not purchased off the registry so at the very least we'll get a discount! You know I'm always searching for discounts!
Had my 14 week checkup today and heard the heartbeat again. That is just the coolest thing. Next checkup is the ultrasound and I can't wait to see the baby and have J there to hear the heartbeat. I already told my dr that we do not want to find out the sex. I know we are bucking the popular trend but it is kind of a family tradition not to find out and I figure that I will need something to help me get through the labor!

Daycare already?

13 weeks...and I guess I expected to magically wake up on Monday and the m/s to be gone. Boy was I wrong. If anything it has been worse this week. Monday J and I had an appt at a daycare to tour the facilities. Well right before I was to leave, I threw up my lunch...called J to see if he could go alone but he was running late. So I show up looking like crap and midway through the tour I start to feel really faint, so I ran to the car, put my feet up, and put the a/c on blast while slowing eating some cheerios, leaving J to fend for himself. It was not a good day. However, the daycare was pristinely clean and very professional. Doesn't hurt either that most of the staff are from the Big Ten either. It was the most expensive daycare and doesn't have an opening until July, which would cause me to take a whole month of maternity leave unpaid.
Today I toured 2 other daycares (J was too busy at work). One place was country, and if you know me, you know that is not my scene. The other place was better and very laid back. I got a good feeling from it and it is not as expensive as the one from Monday, but it also was not so detailed and professional. We're going to sit down and decide tonight.
Who knew we even had to think of this so early? With our wedding, I was so organized with a budget and a timeline of when things had to get done, and had the same amount of time to plan- 9 mths. With this baby, I feel so disorganized and so unaware of everything we need to do and buy. I have read the baby books but maybe they haven't sunk in and I have yet to find a timeline. I am going to do some research and get myself organized...

karma

Ok, Ok, so I talked to my friend last night (also preggers) who, at one point, was throwing up 9 times a day. So I admit, I'm a total B for complaining about some nausea yesterday. Though karma did come back to bite me today as I was bowing down to the porcelain throne this morning.
However, I reserve the right to drop kick any girl that has the nerve to brag that they've "never had morning sickness." Not just for me, but most importantly, for my friend too.
On a brighter note, I received a package from MSU today with the cap I bought to bring the baby home in. Also bought a onesie that says "Future Tailgater" on it to match, but didn't realize that the only size they had was 6 mo. Oh well, I'll still keep it for when the baby gets bigger. Pictures to come, once I figure out how to do them.

All day sickness

PLEASE can the m/s go away?
First of all, why do they call it morning sickness anyways? For me, the nausea lasts all day and all night. J got home at midnight last night & I had gone to bed at 8, but I was up anyways because my tummy was continuously growling.
Second of all, WHY DIDN'T ANYONE WARN ME??? I mean of all the women in my life, someone should have sat me down and said, this is the deal...when you get pregnant for the first 2 weeks or so it is glorious, then the sickness, exhaustion, constant peeing, gas, bloating, etc will set in and you will feel like crap 24/7. Everyone will ask you if you are excited, but it will be hard to put a smile on your face, so leave the excitement up to the hubby for awhile. So friends that have not had kids yet, here you go and if you want it straight, feel free to ask me. Though I guess some people may choose to be oblivious which is not a bad thought, but not for me.
And the worst part for me, is the constantly STUFFING MY FACE. Nothing sounds good, then my stomach growls as if the baby is saying "Feed Me Now!" and so I sit and think for a good few minutes about what I can put down my throat. It's like "The Night Before Christmas" with the kids dreaming about all their goodies, only in my head it is a slot machine and I always land on the item that makes me want to puke. I have to pull the arm time and time again until I find something that vaguely sounds appetizing. And even then it is a toss up whether or not the smell of it will make me nauseous. I am so tired of food! Hopefully it will be gone soon, though I have the feeling I will be one of those lucky few that has it the whole time.

MAGIC!!!

Ahhh...oh, excuse me. I HAD to unbutton my pants.
I freaked out the other night because J said that I was starting to show...AT 12 WEEKS!!! Well, I don't know if I'm showing already, but I am thinking it is just bloat. However, more this week than any other week am I noticing my waist thickening and my work pants & jeans are just not cutting it.
Gap and ON are having a sale right now on baby clothes and maternity clothes. Even though it is a little early for maternity clothes (and my original thought was to wear regular clothes as long as possible), it is a SALE people!  I decided that it is ridiculous to be so uncomfortable so I swung by to see what Gap had. As soon as I put on the panel dress pants...MAGIC!!! Of course I have to get them hemmed (story of my life) but I am so excited to start wearing them. Who knew one could get so excited about maternity pants??
After I made a beeline for the maternity pants, I decided to check out the sale on baby clothes. However, it was as frustrating as usual because it seems no one makes neutral clothing anymore...are we the only ones left that don't want to find out the sex??...but that's for another day...